He’s satisfied with himself. If you have a soul you can’t be satisfied.
Healing After Narcissistic Abuse
If you are an empath, you have likely encountered a narcissist. Sometimes, it is a brief, painful encounter that we can easily walk away from once we recognize the pattern.
But what happens when you can’t completely cut ties?
Whether it is a co-parent, a family member, or a boss, there are times when an empath must navigate a relationship with a narcissistic individual daily. When we are trapped in these dynamics, therapists and survival guides often prescribe a common, highly effective tactic: The Grey Rock Method.
The goal of Grey Rock is to become as uninteresting and unreactive as possible. You don’t provoke. You give short, non-committal answers. You deaden your emotions and your expression so the narcissist gets bored and stops feeding off your energy.
Let me be clear: The Grey Rock method is a lifesaver. When you are in the middle of a toxic storm, when your boundaries are new, or when you are actively under attack, Grey Rocking is a necessary survival tool. It stops the energetic bleeding. It helps you find your equilibrium so you can catch your breath.
But there is a hidden danger to this technique: Sometimes, the empath gets too good at it.
The Danger of Staying a Grey Stone
Grey Rocking is a triage tool, not a lifestyle.
When you get too good at Grey Rocking—and you use it long after the active crisis has passed—you aren’t just protecting your energy; you are deadening it.
You are a sensitive, spiritual being. Your natural operating system is flow, feeling, and connection. When you force yourself into a chronic state of “Grey Rock,” you are actively suppressing your true nature. You end up building a numb version of the Phantom Persona—the mask we wear to survive and keep the peace.
Getting good at Grey Rocking is dangerous long-term because it simply isn’t natural for you. It requires you to shut down your heart center, which is the very source of your power.
The Next Stage: Embodying the Rose Rock
During a recent session with a client who was struggling with this exact dynamic, I was led by a powerful Goddess to introduce a new concept. My client had successfully used the Grey Rock method to find her equilibrium. She was no longer in active crisis. But she felt numb, disconnected, and exhausted.
She didn’t need to be a grey stone anymore. She was ready for the Integration stage.
I told her: It is time to move from Grey Rock to Rose Rock.
Rose Rocking does not replace Grey Rocking; it is the stage after you have found your equilibrium. Once your nervous system is regulated and you feel safely rooted in your own body, you can drop the grey stone and embody the Rose Quartz. You embody unconditional love.
Rose Rocking does not mean you drop your boundaries. It does not mean you overly express yourself, people-please, or try to “fix” the narcissist with your love (we already know that over-functioning drains our energy).
Rose Rocking simply means you radiate the love that you already are in your soul. You remain quiet, contained, and grounded, but instead of vibrating with suppressed fear or forced numbness, you hold the frequency of deep, unshakeable love. You don’t need the narcissist to receive it, understand it, or change because of it. You are simply refusing to dim your own light just because you are in their presence.
The Age of the Narcissistic Father
This practice is not just for our interpersonal relationships; it is the exact medicine required for the world right now.
If we look at the macro level, we are currently living in the Age of the Narcissistic Father. Our modern society operates heavily on an unhealed Solar Plexus model. It is a “Power-Over” culture obsessed with dominance, wealth, status, and force. The collective energy often feels like a giant, demanding narcissist telling us we are never doing enough, producing enough, or succeeding enough.
In response, many sensitive souls have tried to “Grey Rock” the world. We numb out. We doom-scroll. We deaden our emotions because the political and social stage is too painful to watch.
But you were not born at this time to be numb. Empaths are here to demonstrate how to operate from the Heart Chakra. We are the evolutionary corrective to a dominance-based society.
Rose Rocking on the World Stage
The way this world heals is through the Heart Chakra. Empaths and non-empaths can honor our nature and help heal it by Rose Rocking on the political and social stage.
We do not have to engage in the toxic, screaming matches of the unhealed Solar Plexus culture. We don’t have to fight force with force. But we also cannot afford to go numb.
We must hold our ground, establish our boundaries, and radiate the inexorable, unconditional love of the Rose Quartz. We must embody “Power-With” connection in a “Power-Over” world.
The next time you are faced with a narcissistic individual—or simply the overwhelming narcissism of our current culture—take a deep breath. Drop your roots into the earth. You don’t have to turn to stone to be safe.
You just have to be the Rose.
